A Path to Equanimity

Wat Pa Tam Wa, Mae Hong Son, Thailand. Photo by JoAnn Saccato

How can I attain peace in this moment? How can I get to equanimity? Once I have it, how can I hold onto it?

Equanimity, that deep sense of peaceful well being, is highly sought after in these days of social and emotional turmoil. Now more than ever, as our hearts, minds and bodies are being taxed with our present conditions, we are seeking refuge. We are all looking for a break from what is happening, much less a perpetual state of calm mind amidst anything disturbing.

How can I attain peace in this moment? How can I get to equanimity? How can I hold onto it?

There’s usually a litany of actions and steps that come to mind that may include trying to create certain conditions, or to stop or change what is  happening in our bodies, homes, workplace, communities, nations, and the world. We think the answer lies somewhere in struggling and wrestling with current conditions, trying to bend them to our liking or stop them completely.

As it turns out, while there are things we can actively do to help this deep pleasant peacefulness that we call equanimity arise, it’s actually a different and more restful path. 

 And rather than creating conditions for it to arise, though there are things we can do to grow equanimity, it’s really more like a revealing. Equanimity is actually always present and available, but is usually covered over by our struggle with present moment reality. Equanimity is part of our true nature that is revealed when we let go of striving or grasping for things to be different than they are, including our own mind states. So our path toward equanimity isn’t about moving or striving toward it, rather, it’s more about stepping back and letting things be as they are. It's more about acceptance and allowance.

How can we cultivate these conditions so it can be known, it can be experienced directly?

Burned tree in Boggs State Forest. Spring, 2020. Photo by JoAnn Saccato.

First we work with mindfulness practices that help us come to know the conditioned mind and our relationship to it. Here, we notice how we:

• get caught in story, habit or spacing out. Get lost in daydreaming, catastrophizing the future or lamenting the past.
• put effort into trying to create things, resolve things, fix things. (It’s not that these actions aren’t an important part of living, it’s that when they take all our attention without our being aware and we lose direct felt connection with this moment, this full experience, trouble arises.

So we practice letting go again and again the mind’s attempts to direct and control and keep us disconnected from our direct present moment experience.  And when we let go, a new freedom arises when we’re not busy with all of that efforting. Sometimes this experience of freedom is a delicious relaxation and buoyancy and other times it can be a deep exhaustion from finally letting go of this heavy load, of this major struggle.

As the struggle falls away and we bring our attention to what remains, there is pure experience and pure awareness and our natural goodness that arises. There is even this deep well-being that we know as equanimity—calmness and composure. And then we get the gift of consciously living the experience of our true nature.

So first we stop the pain of the struggle to control, to reform things to our desire, then we experience what remains, and then we can orient toward the goodness, toward the joy. There is a natural goodness AND we can foster this goodness to grow—to no bounds as far as I can tell. Science, particularly neuroscience, tells us we can grow this good. We can create neural networks that make this goodness more readily available by being conscious when we experience the good and allowing it to linger. We can, as Rick Hansen tells us, use our mind to change our brain, which changes our mind, which changes our brain, and so on. I don't know that science has found a ceiling for this goodness.

So, experiencing and cultivating these beneficial mind states that are first glimpsed when we end the suffering of busyness, control, and attachment leads to the goodness of equanimity, compassion, loving kindness, and sympathetic joy. Peaceful contentment regardless of outer conditions and circumstances.

To taste a practice that begins to open and release the struggle, try this one from a recent Mindful Monday Meditation on Facebook. I'm curious to learn about your experience with this practice and invite you to leave a comment on Facebook or down below.

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Author

JoAnn Saccato, MA, is a certified teacher with the Mindfulness Training Institute, life coach, author and consultant. She is the author of Companioning the Sacred Journey: A Guide to Creating a Compassionate Container for Your Spiritual Practice and Mindful and Intentional Living: A Path to Peace Clarity and Freedom.

Mindfulness is an umbrella term used for a large body of popular health and wellness practices based on purposefully bringing a curious, kind and non-judgmental attention to moment by moment experience. It is a scientifically proven approach that helps reduce stress and stress-related illnesses, increase focus and attention, decrease incidences of and relapses with depression, reduce anxiety, reduce relapses in addiction, and aids in sleep and digestive disorders. It has also been shown to increase well being, life satisfaction and happiness, as well as improved social relationships.

You can reach JoAnn at [email protected]. To follow her visit: www.MindfulAndIntentionalLiving.com